Absurd Indian Thoughts & Implementations

With nothing happening in the world to blog about as such (There is a lot happening actually, but like the gossip-stricken Indian media, I’m more concerned about a spat on a reality TV show, Shahrukh Khan appearing in an item song and Kareena Kapoor inaugurating a jewellery store), I decided to hop back in time to pluck out some of India’s most embarrassing ideas and their even more delirious implementations.

Regional pride and the “Sons of the soil” concept are numero uno in the list. In what is an absolutely baseless, senseless, hopeless, half-mental and three fourth-detrimental school of thought, Raj Thackeray and the MNS have outdone all other embarrassing Indian ideas to actually create a North-South divide that is anti-constitutional, anti-national and all the other anti’s you could pick out from your understanding. God only knows what Thackeray had in mind when he decided to undertake some “noble work” for his “fellow populace”. Unleashed on the roads were wild Marathis who sabotaged “non-local” cab drivers, ruined their hard work and proceeded to showcase the un-Indian paranoia that has gripped them with a demonic clasp.

There was a ghastly, mind-boggling, common sense-defying suggestion not too long ago in the Times of India editorial stressing on why cricket players from different countries should play for another country. The article tried to convince me and other astounded folk of the country who read the same that how exciting it would be to watch Brett Lee put on an India jersey and represent cricket’s most passionately supported team. How exciting, indeed. Our lack of sports intelligence clearly shows as we are willing to go to such extents to ensure maximum entertainment. Entertainment, I said. Not passion and love for a sport. This one wasn’t implemented. I guess, not even considered.

Another appalling Indian idea was the government’s decision to remove hockey and football from India’s list of “sporting priorities”. One is India’s national sport. The other is the world’s most followed sport. To the embarrassment of the federation, the players of both sports produced outstanding Cup tournaments which followed this horrendous decision. The men with the sticks won the Asia Cup after producing a goal fest (57 goals were scored by India. Only 5 were conceded) and an authoritarian display to run amok. The footballers won India’s first trophy, the Nehru Cup, since the LG Cup in 2002.

Some more absurd ideas and their implementations will follow soon. Till then, let’s hope reality and the Indian government don’t throw up new ones.