Aaj Tak reporter: Toh aap ko kaun lagta hai King of Khans, Shahrukh?
Shah Rukh Khan: Arey, kahaan King. Hum kahaan ke King, yaar. King toh Billie-Jean King hai. King toh Larry King hai. Hum toh employees hai.
TCGH offers an exclusive copy of HOW TO FOOL PEOPLE AND BECOME A SUPERSTAR to the response that best explains the logic in the above reply.
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When a man can give as stellar a performance as the one that Shahrukh Khan gave in Chak De India and produce that despicable, deplorable and appalling show at the Filmfare Awards 2008, then something just isn’t right. He is an example of how to create a positive image that is totally accredited to others (directors, script writers, dialogue writers and all the other noble men who have made Shahrukh “King Khan”) and in the meantime be your dim-witted, futile self when you want to be so.
Yes, this is Shahrukh Khan. The way we don’t know him actually. Given his God-gifted talent, you’d expect him to produce the kind of work he has done in Chak De & Swades and the other rare good films of his. But the guy is clearly blank from within and is more a plastic icon than a role model.
Since there is God in India and after God there’s him, most of us will have enjoyed it like all the other dustbin fillers of the film industry did on the fateful night. But there is really no logic behind that abysmal showing. Apparently, if dancing in a towel with fellow gay impressionist Saif Ali Khan (whom Kareena Kapoor should be fearing sleeping with now) would have impressed Sanjay Leela Bhansali enough to cast him in his next film, then it’s a job well done sir.
But if the Kabir Khan of Chak De and Mohan Bhargav of Swades can produce this kind of flush-it-before-it-stinks factory garbage, then his credentials as one of the country’s faces should be dissected.
Now, before we get more dustbin content than we already have. Mr. SRK, this one stinks so bad that I don’t have cats and dogs sniffing around it seeking some stomach fillers.
It’s a weird world. No wait, it just got weirder.
This “weird” piece on DNA India’s website reports about an Argentinean girl who is the mother of seven kids at the age of just, well yes, 16. She had given birth to a boy at the age of 14 and followed that up with two sets of triplets in consecutive years giving doctors something to brainstorm on.
I’d written about my feelings on mob justice in modern India in a previous post. And now we have a second case to reflect on. Two students in Hajipur, Bihar engaged in a fight over a mobile phone which turned ugly when one of them stabbed the other, dragged him onto the streets and was “assisted” in this self-endorsed act of justice by a mob. Our age-old habit of chickening out and turning into mere spectators came good once again. Not just the people, even the police.
If anything improves in the country with time, it is the degree of controversy generated by a syndrome of “we-hate-each-other-so-damn-much” actions complemented by an in-built urge to curb benevolence and go deaf and dumb at malevolence.
The war of words between actor Shahrukh Khan and Union Health minister Anbumani Ramadoss regarding the on-screen smoking controversy reached another level after the minister accused SRK of trying to limit the scope of the word “creative liberty”. Ramadoss directed praise at Aamir Khan and his once-in-many-lifetimes Taare Zameen Par, stating that creativity should be used to improve societal minds and not encourage habits that kill a million Indians every year.
Talking of SRK and Aamir, the country is braced up for a potential Filmfare awards “upset” when SRK takes on the more-deserving Darsheel Safary for the Best Actor accolade. SRK may have produced a decent effort in Chak De India, but no one can rule out the influence that Darsheel and Aamir have had on our lives since Taare Zameen Par and it would be great for him to snap up the honour.
Something right should happen once in a while to continue to keep hope alive. It is on a life-critical support system already.....
Here's a quiz you'd rather not take.
1) Why does Bollywood nobody Sajid Khan appear on Headlines Today's cricket special regarding the moolah set to be raked in by the Indian Premier League's pool of players?
2) Why did Ashutosh Gowarikar select pretty boy Hrithik Roshan for King Akbar's role in the film Akbar-Jodha?
3) Why are producers making films for Himesh Reshammiya? And more importantly, why are the names of his movies(Aap Ka Surroor, Karzz, A Love Iiisshtory) forcing us to stress our nasal capabilities, which he so expertises in?
4) Why has Shahrukh Khan's interest in sports upscaled suddenly? (Hint: The IPL will be watched by millions of people around the country. SRK has a movie coming up soon. Pick up the pieces.)
5) Why has so-godly regular-cleavage-popping damsel Mallika Sherawat been cast as a friend of Jesus Christ in an upcoming Hollywood movie?
6) Why have such things forced me to become so retarded?
